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Post by King Leonidas on Feb 28, 2007 10:37:37 GMT -5
You now have long hair, only problem is it got caught in a fan blade the next day. I wish I had a better computer. -DL
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Post by Samurai Slayer on Feb 28, 2007 10:45:40 GMT -5
You have a computer that's better than all the others at taking over the world, much like what happens in the Terminator movies storyline. I wish my penis would fall off...
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Post by Mistress.Nairakarn on Feb 28, 2007 11:02:57 GMT -5
I wish my penis would fall off... You get in a horrible car accident, losing every body part from the waist down. I wish I didn't have acne.
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Post by Slipper Eater on Feb 28, 2007 13:06:21 GMT -5
You no longer have acne; but your acne bursts and floods your room with pus. At which point you slip and drown in said pus. I wish... hmm. I wish I had ben and jerrys.
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Post by Mistress.Nairakarn on Feb 28, 2007 13:17:08 GMT -5
You no longer have acne; but your acne bursts and floods your room with pus. At which point you slip and drown in said pus. I wish... hmm. I wish I had ben and jerrys. Now my chance for revenge, you do have Ben and Jerrys, handed to you enough to last your whole life... A 500 foot wave of Ben and Jerrys, from an ocean of ice cream, falls on you, and you drown in the Ben and Jerrys ocean. Ahh such a perfect example of an eye, for an eye. I wish I never had to see the sun again.
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Post by Slipper Eater on Feb 28, 2007 13:20:33 GMT -5
You never have to see the sun again, because you're catapulted right into it and turned into.... crispy fries!
I wish my back didn't hurt so much.
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Post by Mistress.Nairakarn on Feb 28, 2007 13:30:03 GMT -5
You never have to see the sun again, because you're catapulted right into it and turned into.... crispy fries! I wish my back didn't hurt so much. You lose your head, in a helicopter accident, so you can never feel your back again. I wish I didn't make so many typos.
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Post by Slipper Eater on Feb 28, 2007 13:36:00 GMT -5
You don't make any more typos, but suddenly you realise that you have a monkey attached to your penis that gives you untypoing abilities of doom. I wish I could see Adam Lazzara naked.
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Post by Mistress.Nairakarn on Feb 28, 2007 13:41:48 GMT -5
I wish I could see Adam Lazzara naked. Granted, after Adam Lazzara takes 10 steriods a day, for 20 years, gets a flat top, and gets facial surgery to look like a Murloc. I wish I could tell, what other people were thinking about me.
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iusia
Apprentice
From: My place of reverence... I call it home.
Posts: 136
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Post by iusia on Feb 28, 2007 18:13:21 GMT -5
you can tell what other people are thinking about you, but the noise becomes so overwhelming that your head 'splodes into a million littles pieces! oh noes!
i wish i won teh internets...
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Post by King Leonidas on Feb 28, 2007 19:28:57 GMT -5
You won the internet in a contest and use it to start a global empire, but quickly the new responsibility hurdles you into a countless wave of debt. The few remaining free nations on the planet use your unpaid fees as justification to kill you and nominate George W. Bush as the leader of the planet. Two years later Bush typically sets off all nuclear weapons across the world and we all die. I wish I could attain Serenity. -DL
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Post by thevikinggoddess on Feb 28, 2007 21:41:02 GMT -5
You attain Serenity, but it is in fact the utter slaughter of a battlefield survived only by ten or so people. Get used to the smell of bodies; you'll be there about 7 weeks.
I wish my computer were back with me, fixed and perfect again.
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Post by King Leonidas on Feb 28, 2007 22:57:43 GMT -5
Your old PC is on your doorstep good as new and un-fooled around with. But as you pick it up; a neighbor's child runs up your patio, pushes you, and you drop it. It falls to the floor and the CD drive ejects a disc straight into your gonads, to make matters worse, the child smashes the computer with a big hammer and runs from you across the border into Canada. I wish I had a pet Clanfear that is trained to not butsecks me or shred me to pieces. -DL
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iusia
Apprentice
From: My place of reverence... I call it home.
Posts: 136
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Post by iusia on Feb 28, 2007 23:38:06 GMT -5
You get your Clannfear, complete with postitive behaviour training. It doesn't shred you to pieces or try to you... but one day you while walking your Clannfear you throw a stick for it to catch, but it accidently falls off a cliff and hits the last nest of Cliffracers in existence, which all hatch and spread all around Tamriel. Good going retard. I wish I had the knowledge of the entire universe, which my mind could support and NOT collapse under the weight of the information, and my body was un-aging and indestructible.
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Post by thevikinggoddess on Feb 28, 2007 23:40:22 GMT -5
It falls to the floor and the CD drive ejects a disc straight into your gonads I am a girl. You are silly. I wish I had the knowledge of the entire universe, which my mind could support and NOT collapse under the weight of the information, and my body was un-aging and indestructible. Hmm. You are now omniscient and eternal. However, you are still ugly. Noone will ever sex you, and you will have the pleasure of watching everyone you know die over the years. To add to that, aliens are going to blow up the earth. You will spend your eternal life and youth floating about in the airless void. Yee-haw. I wish I got straight A's all the rest of my educational career without trying very hard, retained all the relevant bits of everything I learned, and got into a wonderful and satisfying law school. (What, ambition?)
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iGuess
Gallant
I'm just in it for the butt-secks.
Posts: 2,384
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Post by iGuess on Mar 1, 2007 0:06:22 GMT -5
I wish I got straight A's all the rest of my educational career without trying very hard, retained all the relevant bits of everything I learned, and got into a wonderful and satisfying law school. (What, ambition?) I get jealous and kill you. I wish my life was perfect.
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Post by thevikinggoddess on Mar 1, 2007 0:11:47 GMT -5
You would bore everyone and they would hate you with a deep and secret passion that would eventually boil over and explode in your face in the middle of your Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech. By which I mean actual exploding podiums.
I wish...I was a morphmagus and would never get stuck.
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iGuess
Gallant
I'm just in it for the butt-secks.
Posts: 2,384
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Post by iGuess on Mar 1, 2007 0:17:16 GMT -5
But if that happened, then my life wouldn't perfect. Thus, you lose.
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Post by duckofdoom on Mar 1, 2007 12:18:28 GMT -5
You would bore everyone and they would hate you with a deep and secret passion that would eventually boil over and explode in your face in the middle of your Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech. By which I mean actual exploding podiums. I wish...I was a morphmagus and would never get stuck. Ugh, I hate to do this, but... you're a great wee morphmagus [whatever the hell that is] and you're happily strawling all the areas without the fear of getting stuck... until a large elephant falls right on top of you, whistling "Stuck in the middle with you". I wish for penance because of what I did to TVG here, in this thread
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Zann
Gallant
Not all jokes are funny...
Posts: 3,613
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Post by Zann on Mar 1, 2007 14:29:18 GMT -5
You are given penance, but get the blame for such a horrible crime you are sent directly to the lowest level of hell!
I wish I never had to piss or crap.
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Post by duckofdoom on Mar 1, 2007 17:32:59 GMT -5
You are a creature that does not expell any waste products from your body; as a result, processed toxins in your organism kill you within a week, during which you're enduring tremendous pain.
I wish I was younger.
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Post by starscream on Mar 1, 2007 17:59:00 GMT -5
You're a new born baby. Unfortunately, there's nobody to look after you.
I wish this PC wasn't as slow as it is.
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Post by Samurai Slayer on Mar 1, 2007 18:12:06 GMT -5
Your pc is really fast, but hackers take it over and use it to look at illegal child porn, where you get arrested for it...
I wish I was a wrestler...
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Post by thevikinggoddess on Mar 1, 2007 18:42:26 GMT -5
You are a wrestler. Unfortunately, you are Nacho Libre.
I wish a nice and non-murderous safe driver would give me a ride to the computer store and back so I could get MY FIXED LAPTOP.
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Post by Samurai Slayer on Mar 1, 2007 18:44:04 GMT -5
Your wish is granted, but a mean murderous dangerous driver hits you guys, totally crushing your laptop... I wish that my wound would stop bleeding...
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