Post by Samurai Slayer on Jul 21, 2006 7:42:01 GMT -5
Beware! This story SUCKS. It's just something I wrote (literally) the moment I woke up today, because I had nothing better to do.
One day, SamuraiSlayer, DH and eek were walking through a forest, when all of a sudden they stumbled across somebody's porn stash.
"eek, wtf is your porn doing in the middle of the forest, and not in your room?" asked SS.
"I honestly don't have a clue..." eek said, "but I'll be right back"
eek walked into the bushes for about 5 minutes, the bush shaking the whole time. (
)
Once he was done they continued walking, and out of nowhere, a bear jumped out of nowhere and raped DH, then promptly killed him. In a matter of minutes, the bear gave birth to this:
It was an abomination of nature, so eek used a transformation spell and turned into Link so he could shoot the horrible creature.
After it was dead, they left the forest, and decided to go visit Lynx.
Little did they know that Lynx was a southern hick and sat on his porch with a shotgun to kill trespassers. eek walked up, "Hi! What's ---". The sound of a shotgun blasted through the air, and eek dropped to the ground, dead.
SS ran like a mother-
er past Lynx's house and into the pokemon valley. For about 10 minutes, he sat and rested, but was confronted by an evil pikachu.
"PIKA PIKA, PIIIIKAAAACHUUUUUU" it yelled in a strangely raspy voice. It turned around and turned on some Thrash Metal on it's CD player.
"haha, hi Raist!" Shane said, "I knew that was too tall for a pikachu."
"SS? Is that you?"
"Yes, it is"
"What's going on, meng?"
"Not much, just running away from Lynx, he killed eek"
"Wow! That sucks!"
"Yea, and this bear killed DH, and I had to kill it's baby."
"Hm, that sucks too..."
"Yea! It looked like this:
"
".......wtf?"
"Yea, I know" SS replied.
Raist's music shut off. They both looked over at the CD player to see a beautiful emo chick standing there.
"You all should play some Thrice, instead of Children of Bodom" She told them.
"No, no way in hell" Raist rebuttled.
"Well then..." she replied, as she pulled out a knife, "This is the end for you..."
She then promptly robbed both of them, and stabbed the hell out of the CD Player, and ran away.
They chased her down, but hit a fork in the road, so they decided to split ways and say goodbye to eachother.
A couple of hours later, Shane ran into her again, but she was in some random person's shower... He was horribly disgusted at the site, but it was also a site he couldn't look away from..
"Well, it isn't THAT disgusting" he thought.
"WTF are you looking at? You know you're my brother, right?" questioned the girl.
"I knew you looked familiar!"
"Yea..."
"Wanna watch some tv?"
"Okay"
They walked out into the living room, and she turned on some tv.
"This is porn," Shane stated.
"Yea, it's good stuff" she said.
"So, Danni, umm, who's that behind you?"
"Oh, that's just the pool boy, StealthJunkie"
"Haha, he's a junkie" Shane joked.
"yea, he's addicted to more than just stealth. He's also addicted to meth and cocaine." she informed him.
Stealth whipped out a gun and shot the two of them on sight. As he did for the people who were just knocking on the door to visit him, Muad'dib and Ratwar.
Stealth performed some necromancy spell to bring Danni back to life.
Danni used her cell phone to call Twitchmonkey and Vinya to come destroy Stealth before he
-rammed her.
They showed up as he was-ramming her, and they both shot at him, as he pulled a lever.
One bullet got him in the face, and he died. Twitch and Vinya were dropped through a secret passage in the floor, into a pit of spikes, where they died.
Danni was pissed. She performed a spell to bring everybody back to life, but it didn't work out too well. Everybody kept trying to eat her brains, so she went to Washington DC and had George Bush launch a nuclear bomb on the land of the pokemon.
He did it, and it killed most of the islands inhabitants. The remaining civilians rallied together to shoot a bomb back at the US. This started a war that killed millions of people and billions of pokemon.
Danni took the pokemons' side, and summoned the help of the Power Rangers and the Ninja Turtles. With their help, they successfully assassinated Dick Cheney and George Bush.
2 months later, the US was in ruins, not a single person lived, and the pokemon celebrated, and built their civilization over the humans'.
And they lived happily ever after, until the day the Sailor Moon crew and Molly Ringwald invaded the United States of Pokemon.
But that's a different story...
One day, SamuraiSlayer, DH and eek were walking through a forest, when all of a sudden they stumbled across somebody's porn stash.
"eek, wtf is your porn doing in the middle of the forest, and not in your room?" asked SS.
"I honestly don't have a clue..." eek said, "but I'll be right back"
eek walked into the bushes for about 5 minutes, the bush shaking the whole time. (
)Once he was done they continued walking, and out of nowhere, a bear jumped out of nowhere and raped DH, then promptly killed him. In a matter of minutes, the bear gave birth to this:
It was an abomination of nature, so eek used a transformation spell and turned into Link so he could shoot the horrible creature.
After it was dead, they left the forest, and decided to go visit Lynx.
Little did they know that Lynx was a southern hick and sat on his porch with a shotgun to kill trespassers. eek walked up, "Hi! What's ---". The sound of a shotgun blasted through the air, and eek dropped to the ground, dead.
SS ran like a mother-
er past Lynx's house and into the pokemon valley. For about 10 minutes, he sat and rested, but was confronted by an evil pikachu. "PIKA PIKA, PIIIIKAAAACHUUUUUU" it yelled in a strangely raspy voice. It turned around and turned on some Thrash Metal on it's CD player.
"haha, hi Raist!" Shane said, "I knew that was too tall for a pikachu."
"SS? Is that you?"
"Yes, it is"
"What's going on, meng?"
"Not much, just running away from Lynx, he killed eek"
"Wow! That sucks!"
"Yea, and this bear killed DH, and I had to kill it's baby."
"Hm, that sucks too..."
"Yea! It looked like this:
"".......wtf?"
"Yea, I know" SS replied.
Raist's music shut off. They both looked over at the CD player to see a beautiful emo chick standing there.
"You all should play some Thrice, instead of Children of Bodom" She told them.
"No, no way in hell" Raist rebuttled.
"Well then..." she replied, as she pulled out a knife, "This is the end for you..."
She then promptly robbed both of them, and stabbed the hell out of the CD Player, and ran away.
They chased her down, but hit a fork in the road, so they decided to split ways and say goodbye to eachother.
A couple of hours later, Shane ran into her again, but she was in some random person's shower... He was horribly disgusted at the site, but it was also a site he couldn't look away from..
"Well, it isn't THAT disgusting" he thought.
"WTF are you looking at? You know you're my brother, right?" questioned the girl.
"I knew you looked familiar!"
"Yea..."
"Wanna watch some tv?"
"Okay"
They walked out into the living room, and she turned on some tv.
"This is porn," Shane stated.
"Yea, it's good stuff" she said.
"So, Danni, umm, who's that behind you?"
"Oh, that's just the pool boy, StealthJunkie"
"Haha, he's a junkie" Shane joked.
"yea, he's addicted to more than just stealth. He's also addicted to meth and cocaine." she informed him.
Stealth whipped out a gun and shot the two of them on sight. As he did for the people who were just knocking on the door to visit him, Muad'dib and Ratwar.
Stealth performed some necromancy spell to bring Danni back to life.
Danni used her cell phone to call Twitchmonkey and Vinya to come destroy Stealth before he
-rammed her.They showed up as he was
-ramming her, and they both shot at him, as he pulled a lever. One bullet got him in the face, and he died. Twitch and Vinya were dropped through a secret passage in the floor, into a pit of spikes, where they died.
Danni was pissed. She performed a spell to bring everybody back to life, but it didn't work out too well. Everybody kept trying to eat her brains, so she went to Washington DC and had George Bush launch a nuclear bomb on the land of the pokemon.
He did it, and it killed most of the islands inhabitants. The remaining civilians rallied together to shoot a bomb back at the US. This started a war that killed millions of people and billions of pokemon.
Danni took the pokemons' side, and summoned the help of the Power Rangers and the Ninja Turtles. With their help, they successfully assassinated Dick Cheney and George Bush.
2 months later, the US was in ruins, not a single person lived, and the pokemon celebrated, and built their civilization over the humans'.
And they lived happily ever after, until the day the Sailor Moon crew and Molly Ringwald invaded the United States of Pokemon.
But that's a different story...
thanks 
of TEH CUTENESS!!
